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The Alpha Babe or B$tch, and How to Tolerate Her

The Alpha Babe, you can spot her a mile away. She usually stands with her shoulders set back, spine erect, and posture perfect. I know this because I am an Alpha female. We usually keep our chins lifted and our eyes peeled as we scan our surroundings. We maintain eye contact with those we converse with, and we usually speak loud, so we can be heard obviously. At times we can be pushy, impatient, and ruthless; perhaps it’s because we’re used to doing things on our own. However, we can also be loving, empathetic, and kind. The alpha babe can be a very complex creature.

I frequent our local grocery store, HEB, more than your average person. I’m pretty much there everyday, sometimes twice a day. I love my HEB. The staff (whom of which I like to call my friends) is beyond friendly! Every time I walk in the store, I get greeted with, “Hey Chef! What’s on the menu today?” I can’t help but love being called CHEF. It makes me feel like I’m important. As if I’m creating something of value. Ha! Trying anyway….

Needless to say, most of my grocery store visits have been pleasant, most of them. Unfortunately, not everyone is as nice as our HEB staff. And even more so, some of us get to experience the rudeness first hand!

I have a speedy, yet efficient system I use when I shop for my clients. To be honest, I take this speedy and efficient system everywhere I go; the gym, Zared’s school, the mall, the parking lot at the mall, work, everywhere. I’ve been told on many occasions that I always look like I’m in a rush, or my favorite, “on a mission.”

Perhaps, it’s because I’m busy, or maybe it’s the alpha in me, but I just like when things get done – fast and right.

One morning after I taught Zumba class, I had to run into HEB to shop for 2 back-to-back clients I was cooking for that day. All of this needed to be done by the time I picked up Zared from his after school program at 5:15, to get him dressed and ready for karate at 5:30 pm. So here I was, pushing my cart, grocery list in hand, still in my sweaty and gross workout clothes from Zumba, my frizzy ponytail bouncing up and down, and goose bumps on my arms from the freezing ac units in the grocery store.

“Hi Chef! What’s on the menu today?”

“Hi Armando! Everything is on the menu! I’m cooking for 2 families of 4 today!” I replied with a smile as I rubbed my super cold arms, furiously pushing my cart through the produce aisles.

As I was making my way towards the kale, another woman, spine erect, chin lifted, and shoulders set back, literally started walking right next to me pushing her cart as rapidly as me. She was stylish, fit, and walked like she was on a mission. I thought to myself, Alpha Babe! I can spot you a mile away! However, considering how big the produce aisles are, I thought it was a little off, how close she pushed her cart next to mine. But because she was within my proximity, I gave her polite eye contact with a pleasant closed smile, as I do to all strangers I come in contact with. She looked at me dead in the eyes, and didn’t smile back. Ok, so some people just don’t like to acknowledge others I guess. I brushed it off. However, as I was coming up on the kale, she literally whizzed right by me, cut me off, and parked her cart right in front of the kale. How did she know I was going for the kale? Ok, Heather, calm down, its just coincidence I thought. But as I was about to ask her if I could squeeze by her cart to grab the kale, she looks at me, points her finger up as to tell me to, “hold on” doesn’t say a word, and immediately starts dialing on her phone to make a call. She gives me a look. A rude look.

All of the sudden she softens as she speaks into the phone….

“Hey Jen. Where are we meeting tonight? Silo? Nooooo! The bartender has such a crush on me it’s so annoying. I’m getting my nails done at 4:30 so I won’t get there until at least 6. What are you wearing? Ewww don’t wear that, it’s sooo Kardashian.”

She then proceeded to have the most pointless and shallow conversation I’ve ever heard. It was by far the worst thing I’ve ever eves dropped on (sort of hating here, sorry not sorry).

What just happened here? Has she no idea how lame her behavior was? Or am I just uber sensitive? She had to have known, but she completely disregarded her behavior as anything out of the ordinary. I was furious. Anyways, at that moment I knew I wasn’t able to talk to her, and even if I tried, she’d probably ignore me anyway. However, it did allow me to take a quick pause and understand that she’s just a sour individual. She’s not an alpha babe, she’s an alpha bitch (and not in a good way), and there’s really nothing I can do about that. But at the same time, it’s something I refuse to tolerate. I walked over to her, and as I reached for her cart to move it out of the way of the kale she says, “Ugh, Jen hold on. What do you think you're doing? Are you seriously touching my cart….” I then point my finger up, as to tell her to, “hold on” (just as she did to me) and I gently placed her cart out of my way to grab the kale. I looked at her, smiled and said, “You probably shouldn’t keep Jen waiting.” I then left her presence to finish shopping for my 2 families of four.

So was she Alpha? Or was she just a bitch? Honestly, it doesn’t matter. But as a strong, proud alpha female, dealing with difficult females such as this, I could never ever back down. I’m a nice person, but just because I’m nice, doesn’t mean I will let you get away with treating me poorly. Ladies, if this happens to you, don’t ever lose your cool. Be graceful, strong, and proud.

BLT Salad with Kale


  • 1 bunch of kale, ribs removed and chopped

  • 1 cup spinach chopped

  • 1 ½ tablespoons vinegar

  • Carton of cherry/grape tomatoes

  • 1 /2 package of bacon, chopped in small pieces

  • 2 slices of gluten-free bread, chopped in pieces (for croutons)

  • 1 teaspoon olive oil

  • A pinch of Himalayan salt and pepper

  • 1 cup of shredded cheese (optional)

  • Cooking spray

Prep/Cook Time: 20 minutes Yields: 4 servings


  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

  2. Prepare the vegetables and bread as listed above.

  3. Toss the kale and the vinegar in a bowl. Place in fridge. Quick tip: kale sweetens up when refrigerated therefore making it taste less bitter when served raw.

  4. Place the bread cubes in a bowl and toss with olive oil, salt, and pepper. Spray the cooking spray on baking sheet and place the bread cubes on the baking sheet. Place in oven and bake for 10 minutes. Allow the croutons to cool before it’s added to the salad.

  5. While the bread is toasting, let’s cook the bacon. Place a sauté pan over medium heat. Once the pan gets hot (after 25 seconds) spray the pan with cooking spray. Add the chopped bacon and cook until bacon is caramelized and crisp. Should take no more than 12 minutes. Be sure to stir the bacon so it doesn’t burn. Once bacon is cooked, set aside on a paper towel so the fat gets absorbed. Allow the bacon to cool before adding it to the salad.

  6. Once the bacon and croutons have cooled off, add them to the kale mixture along with the spinach and tomatoes. Toss thoroughly.

  7. Serve with your favorite dressing!


You can make this salad even more kid-friendly by adding cheese. Kids love cheese! Choose a hard cheese like Monterey jack or cheddar. It’s also not a horrible idea to use ranch dressing for the kiddos because getting them to eat kale, is challenging enough! Let them choose the dressing so it feels like a win-win!

Additional toppings:

-Raw sunflower seeds


- Sliced red onion

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